by Christina Renee | Children, Thoughts
Decisions and Busyness
These past two weeks have been so incredibly busy I don’t know which way to turn. Have you ever felt that way? We were doing and planning instead of waiting on the Lord. We are planning on moving. Our lease is up the end of May and we are not planning on renewing it. We have been looking for rentals and we found one We thought. Because at the last minute my husband received a call that changed all that. His brother called on the way home and asked if he was interested in living in their old family home. He thought I wouldn’t be interested, I thought he wouldn’t. We were both wrong. I looked up the school in the area. It was really good. And small. When we talked about class size, the entire class of… my son said: “my choir class is bigger than that.” My daughter’s high school class is larger than the town’s population. And it’s a good thing.
Small Town vs. City Living
Right now we live in a good-sized city that had the good-sized crime to go along with it. I never thought I’d want to live in a small town again. And I like being 5-10 minutes from anywhere. I can get to the mall, Costco or as much shopping as I want. A lot of them are even 24 hours. We are moving where the only store in town is a Dollar General. The closest stores are 15-20 minutes away and Costco will be 45 minutes. And it’s okay. Because I won’t hear sirens every night. I won’t have code blues at my children’s schools on a several time a month basis. We won’t have letters sent home telling of a threat they deemed uncredible and still you worry. They had a code blue at the small school last month. It was the first in 5 years. 5 Years! That’s unfathomable to me. And what I want.
Children and Meaningful Work
I want my children to learn about hard work again. Apartment living has made all of us a little soft. Someone else fixes everything, mows the yard, shovels the walks. They have Chromebooks for homework and play. They do snow days online instead of making them up. My daughter found out they don’t have Chromebooks there. “what do they use? she wailed. Seriously. My husband told her with a straight face. “Stone tablets.” They might have to write it out. Look up a word in the dictionary instead of Okay Google. I’m fine with that. I believe our children should have meaningful work. Work that makes a difference. Not made up, busy work, but work that benefits other people or self. Not so much that they have no time to create or explore. But enough that they are not so self-centered or video game addicts like so many this generation.
Unfixable
We’ve spent an inordinate amount of time and money fixing things and emptying out the house and trying to see what needed to be done. Driving back and forth almost daily to try and put the house in order. Have you ever been in an older home where if you put a marble down it would roll to the other side of the room? Now imagine it had waves…So we knew we would have to raise the floors. We didn’t know how bad it was underneath. My husband and son opened the floors to find water, rotten wood and mold underneath. To fix them was probably more work than the house was was worth.
Waiting on the Lord
So now we are waiting on the Lord and His timing. We have had lots of advice on what to do next; turn the garage into a house, put a mobile home on the property, find a different rental. We had peace about moving and many prayers that felt it was God’s will for our lives. There is never a wrong place to be if it is inside God’s will. So right now we have 9 weeks to move and no plan in place. It should feel irresponsible and I would be lying if the thought didn’t cross my mind to just hurry and find something. But I feel in my heart that God has a plan for us that is better than any could come up with. He has a plan for your life too. Jerimiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
What are you waiting on the Lord for?
by Christina Renee | Children, Family, Saving Money
Making Birthdays Special on a Budget
We have 2 birthdays coming up next week. I have 2 children only a day apart. I love to celebrate birthdays but I also have a small budget. So I’ve learned to get creative. So I look to see what each child likes and they get to pick the meal and dessert. They also get to pick who they would like to come over. We don’t have birthday parties every year with friends. But they can have a friend or two. So let’s look at the different things we need to budget to making birthdays special on a budget.
Food
I let each child choose what they would like for supper and dessert. Usually, they’ll pick a favorite we don’t have very often. Mostly because of the time it takes but I’m glad to make it for their birthday. One daughter loves fried chicken but with everyone there, it takes about 4 chickens and a long time to make them. As my children have gotten older though different ones are glad to help and do something for the other child’s birthday. Next comes dessert and it doesn’t have to be cake. We’ve had apple, strawberry, chocolate or peanut butter pie. Ice cream cake and of course many different kinds of cake. I make them myself, sometimes with a child’s decorating help. That means lots of sprinkles.
Decorations
Some birthdays have had a theme with decorations usually from the Dollar Tree. But you can find good deals at most stores I always look on end caps for sales. My daughter just found sparkly napkins 70% off for her birthday later this year. If they want a certain character or theme you don’t have to buy all of it in the same line. You can buy one or two things and fill in with cheaper color coordinating paper plates, cups or napkins. Streamers can be any color that goes with it.
Gifts
I have my children give me a list. A written list. If they are just telling me when they see something they like while we are shopping, I probably won’t remember it. So if it’s not in writing then it’s not considered on the list. A great time to look is after Christmas. I find gifts that I know that person would like and stash it in the closet. I do write it down so I remember it. While I’m shopping I always browse the sales. Now I’m not saying to buy something just because it’s on sale or cheap. No. Just be looking around while you are already shopping to see if you find something you know that person would love to have. Something they would pick out for themselves if they could. That’s why I shop early. I want them to love it and know I picked it out specifically for them. I want them to feel loved.
So, do you have any hints on making birthdays special on a budget? Please leave a comment below to share yours.
by Christina Renee | Children, Parenting
Do any of you have children like mine? Ones who put their backpack on the floor instead of the hook for it? Ones who run up the stairs and slam the door on their way. Or plop on the couch, “forget” where their shoes and coats go and how to make their bed? This is where using reminders to train children comes in handy. It’s time for us to work on new habits and those need lots of practice.
Practice, Practice, Practice
When I know that I’ve given them direction on what they are supposed to be doing and they aren’t doing it this is where the reminders come in. I give them the reminder and then they practice them. My son had a hard time getting his backpack on the hook in his room, put there right where he wanted it. So I reminded him and then had him practice it 20 times. Taking his backpack off the floor, going to his room putting it on the hook and then taking it back to the living room floor and doing it all over again. 20 times. We’ve done this for a lot of different things. Practiced sitting on the couch, up and down until 20 is done properly. Going in and out the door and closing it correctly.
Make it easier to do it right
Why am I doing this 20 times? It’s not actually meant as a punishment, it’s a training exercise. By practicing good behavior it gets ingrained. They know what’s expected and how to do it correctly. Also, it needs to be more work than just picking up the backpack and putting it away. It needs to be much more work to do it over. Putting a book on the shelf where it goes is much easier than straightening an entire shelf. Putting silverware away correctly is much easier than emptying and reorganizing the entire drawer.
This is how I am using reminders to train my children. Repetition. Practice. What do you do?
by Christina Renee | Children, Parenting
They’re gone, I can’t find them anywhere.” my son cried. All his handmade Christmas decorations were gone. Every one of them from grade school, all the little ones with his handprints, his pictures and immature handwriting. And it was my fault. My perfectionism caused this and broke my son’s heart.
I wanted it Perfect
The day before we were decorating the tree in the living room All my silver, gold and bronze ornaments twinkling in the lights. Then my son put his handmade decorations up. Right in the front of the tree! I felt horrified. My beautiful tree! The red and green handmade decorations subtracted from all my sparkly loveliness. Son, why don’t we put them on the tree in your room? I had gotten small trees for the boys and girls room after Christmas sales just for that reasons. They could decorate them to their heart’s content and I could keep my beautiful color coordinated tree.” No, I made them just for your tree”, my son said. After coaxing and finally sternly telling him he could either put them on the back of the tree or on his tree he took them down. I did feel a little bad then but consoled myself with the knowledge that he would love them on his tree.
Missing
I spent the next morning while he was at school cleaning up, putting boxes away and throwing out the torn ones. He came home from school and after supper and homework, he asked me to help him decorate his tree. His ornaments weren’t there! I thought he had put them in his room. He hadn’t. He had put them in a box. The boxes had been stacked and went to the trash and so had his ornaments. I felt horrible. He felt horrible. My husband thought if I hadn’t been so fussy about the tree the ornaments wouldn’t be gone.
Gone Forever
The trash dumpster was empty. His ornaments have gone forever. His little kindergarten ones with his handprints, his little angel one with his picture. The ones made of popsicle sticks and all the rest. Gone. Just because I wanted a perfect tree. Why? I’m not perfect. This definitely proves it.
Forgiveness
My son forgave me for throwing out his ornaments. It was an accident but still my fault. We are planning on making some new ornaments to replace what we can. I have pictures of when he was little. But it won’t be the same childish handwriting. It won’t be the same, period. But he gave me forgiveness.
Grace
So why is it so hard to forgive me.? I have berated myself over and over for this. I cried tears and my son cried tears. If only…. How many times do we say this to ourselves? If only…I need to forgive myself. My son forgave me just as The Son has forgiven me. I am forgiven. I am forgiven. Do you have something you need to forgive yourself for? What has your perfectionism cost you? Be kind to yourself. Show love, not only to others but to yourself.
by Christina Renee | Children, Home, Meals, Saving Money
We all have busy weeknights. Work, school, activities, appointments, etc. There are ways to make busy weeknights easier, yo make it go smoother and with less stress. Here are some of those ways.
Routines
When my children get home from school they know a snack and then homework come first. Then they get to play, have dinner and after dinner chores. We have a routine. They know what comes next so they’re not always asking. You know what comes next so you don’t need to think about it. Plan once and follow through makes evening easier. It becomes a habit and builds good habits in your children too.
Dinner
Always know what you’re having dinner by breakfast time at the latest. This is one of the biggest ways to make busy weeknights easier. I really try to menu plan and pull it out the night before. I start everything I can by breakfast that morning. Put supper in the crockpot and when your husband or children get home the house smells wonderful. If it’s a quick meal put it all together in the fridge so you don’t spend time looking for ingredients. I loved this Youtube video from At Home with Nikki where she shared her fridge tour and had a container in her fridge she prepped each night for the next night. If you do forget keep list of very quick meals you can make in a hurry. Our standby is a breakfast meal with eggs and potatoes. I keep a short list on the inside of my cupboard.
Activities, Appointments, Etc
With children in school, most of us have days of running. Sports, after-school clubs or just dr. appointments, there seems like too many days in the car and instead of at home. You can still plan ahead. Most of these are recurring so you know these need to be crockpot or sandwich night. I always have a book with me. If I have to wait and it’s near any errands I need for the week, I do it then. I’ve also listened to reading or helped with homework in the car. Make your time do double duty when it can.
Prep Ahead for the Next Day
After dinner and chores, we get ready for the next day. Check all backpacks. Look at eh calender for the next day including what is happening at school. Lay out clothes, anything that needs to be brought gets set out. I put anything I have to bring in my purse so I don’t forget it, if it’s big it goes in the car early. The children put theirs in their backpacks. Go through showers, if we tried to get ours all at once someone would have cold water. Then we finally get time to relax.
by Christina Renee | Children, Parenting
“Do I consider the material I am examining essential for my children’s pursuit of God and godliness, or is it merely peripheral? Is this idea or that thought indispensable for their walk in the Spirit, or is it only incidental? And most important, will it stir within them a thirst for God, a hunger for His Word, and a desire to represent Him well as salt in the earth.”
Changed into His Image by Jim Berg
Making Choices
I wrote this when I have been laid up for almost a month with pneumonia. The pneumonia is now gone from my lungs but it really messed up my asthma and I am on different meds to try and get it back under control. Through all this I haven’t had a voice above a whisper so I have to choose very carefully the things I need to say since I can’t say it all. I also have paper and pen but I still don’t write as fast as I could talk. It is very limiting. But also, I am limited to the necessary. My children have been wonderful about pitching in together and meals, housework. They have brought me tea, water, books and movies. But I have looked at the superfluous that I have been doing. When it is hard to breathe, many,, many things are unnecessary. So I am looking for what changes I need to be making. Where do I need to cut and what? What are the best choices I can make for my life? Am I evaluating what my children are seeing?
Good, Better, Best
When you go into a store they have listings for items; good, better and best. We have those same choices. But so many times we fall into a pattern or a rut and just do what we have always done. So God has given me this time to evaluate the good, better or best in my life and I am planning some changes. I want things in my life, my husbands, life and my children’s lives that will stir up a thirst for God, that will cause them to pursue Him and represent Him all of our lives and I am willing to do whatever I can to change that. Examine your life, don’t wait for God to take you in hand so you are dependent on Him for your next breath. We are anyway but you don’t have to sound like Darth Vader doing so. Ask Him where you need to change.
