My children and I went to the library, shopping and to lunch last week. It took many times longer than it should have, because of me. Every time we stopped my cam walker had to go back on. Then off to drive. Every time someone went in to get a scooter or go get the wheel out of the trunk for me to ride in. Last week I broke my right foot. My good foot. The one without charcot. Now I have two bad feet. I feel incompetent. I feel like a burden.
Its not the first time this had happened. Multiple surgeries, hospital stays, and several pregnancy bed rests, I learned feelings are not facts. Here are 10 Things to Remember When you Feel Like a Burden
1. Your worth is not determined by your to do list that you check off. Your worth isn’t determined by who you are not by what you do.
2. You can learn to adjust for a while. Most of these are temporary. Bed rest, surgeries, broken bones, all of them are temporary. Look at the end in sight.
3. Even if it’s permanent, allow your self a time to grieve and then move on. It doesn’t do you any good to continually dwell on it. But a loss is hard. You deserve to grieve, to bury the dreams that went with the loss. I always dreamed of learning to dance and do a 5k. Neither of those will ever be possible now. I was sad. I grieved but I didn’t stay there. I’ve had to learn to move on to live the life I have now.
4. Adjust and modify things that you can. I can cook sitting down. It’s not as easy but it’s do able. I use a grabber to reach things. I plan on things taking longer to do.
Do What You Can
5. Do the things you can. Even on bed rest there are still things you can do to help your family and run your household. Use this time to plan. I meal planned, scheduled housekeeping, goal planned, and wrote down what I wanted to accomplish and what i wanted my children to accomplish. I played games, read to my children and lots of cuddle time. They need to be reassured during this time.
Learn Something New
6. Use this time to learn something new. If you’ve wanted to learn something now is the time. You tube has videos for almost everything. Crafty has classes. When you feel like a burden learning something new will up your confidence.
Use Your Time Wisely
7. I know the temptation to sit and watch TV, videos, or Hulu. It’s a way to forget your problems and be entertained. But it’s a huge time waster. Try to spend your time on worthwhile things.
Plan A Project
8. Now is a good time to plan a project. If there’s a project you’e been thinking of now is a good time to plan it. It gives you somethimg to ;look forward to and now you have time,. Plan all the steps, costs, where to get materials, everything you need. Then you’ll be a;; ready when your up and about. Just don’t jump ahead and slow your healing. Ask me how I know.
Help Someone Else
9. You can always help somebody. There is always someone worse off and there are always ways to help others. There are many things I can’t go and get things for someone else but I’m a great planner. I can’t chase my grandson who’s a toddler but I can sit for my granddaughters. I have knowledge and wisdom to share. my children call me for advice, I can listen . There is something you can do to contribute.
Who You Are
10. Know who you are in God’s eyes. Your worth is on who you are. You are a child of the King. You are priceless in His eyes. He know every hair on your head. He loves you more than you know.
Have you had the feeling that you are a burden and more of a hindrance than a help? Please share what you’ve learned through this.