Life is full of challenges. Some days it feels like everything is going against us and there’s nothing we can do to overcome the obstacles in our way. But the fact is, we all have the power to overcome anything life throws at us.
We all face challenges, big and small, on a daily basis. But the good news is that we can overcome anything if we put our minds to it. Here are 7 ways to overcome anything:
1. Belief in yourself.
If you don’t believe in yourself, who will? Have faith in your abilities and trust that you can overcome whatever obstacle is in your way. It may sound cliché, but self-belief is essential if you want to overcome any challenge. When you believe in yourself, you give yourself the strength to keep going even when things are tough.
2. Set your sights high.
If you’re constantly looking for ways to overcome challenges, you’ll find them. But if you set your sights too low, you’ll never push yourself outside of your comfort zone and you’ll never grow or achieve anything great. Visualize success. See yourself overcoming your obstacle in your mind. Go through this step by step, seeing yourself doing what your goal is and suceeding at it.
3. Be persistent.
One of the most important keys to overcoming any challenge is simply not giving up. You may not achieve your goal on the first try, but if you’re persistent, you’ll eventually get there. Never give up and never give in. If you keep pushing forward, eventually you’ll reach your goal.
In the words of Winston Churchill;
Never, never, never, never, never give up
4. Stay positive.
It’s easy to get bogged down by negativity when faced with a difficult situation. But if you stay positive, you’ll be able to see the silver lining and you’ll become more resilient. It’s easy to get down when things are tough, but it’s important to stay positive and keep your head up. Remember, every cloud has a silver lining.
5. Be Thankful.
The year I had 12 surgeries, I made it by keeping a gratitude journal. It’s hard to be complaining and tankful at the same time. I still keep a list to this day. It can be anything from the mundane to special memories. But not all will be special, some days, I’m thankful to just get out of bed. It can be your children playing and getting along, or great smells from supper cooking. There is always something to be thankful for.
6. Keep a Positive Mindset
Use positive self-talk. When negative thoughts about your fear start creeping in, remind yourself of all the times you’ve overcome difficult challenges in the past and how capable you are of doing so again. There are so many resources on the internet today. You can get on Youtube and find meditations with affirmations. You can find Ted Talks or Youtubers that speak on changing your mindset. So many of us have these tape players in our heads saying what you can’t do. Instead, start saying what you can do.
7. Create a support network.
Talk to friends and family about your obtacle/goal and ask for their help and support as you work to overcome it.
Educate yourself. A lot of courses have Facebook groups to help you, or you can find a Facebook group to support you.
8. Lastly, be flexible.
Sometimes the best-laid plans fall apart. When this happens, be flexible and adapt to the situation. The ability to roll with the punches is an essential quality for anyone who wants to overcome anything. Learn from your mistakes. We all make mistakes, but it’s important to learn from them and not repeat them in the future. Mistakes are part of life, but they can teach us valuable lessons if we let them.
One of the hardest things I’ve struggled with is not feeling confident as a mom while sick. I wouldn’t pick a mom with a disability for them. I wish my children had a better mom. One who could run and play with them. One who didn’t need to ask for as much help. Who could go away without having to bring a helper when they didn’t want to go.
How can I be a great mom while I’m in the hospital?
How can I be a good Mom from a wheelchair?
I’m not taking my younger children to the; zoo, museums, field trips, etc that I took my older children to. So does that make me a crappy mom?
How can I be a good Mom when I can’t go see the concerts, plays, football games because, with so many people around, I’d likely get sick. ( And this was before Covid!)
What if my child sees their friend’s parent and all they can do and ask why can’t my Mom do all that? Why do they have a mom with a disability?
I feel bad that I always have to bring one of my kids or my husband with me to get my wheelchair off the back of the car.
Do you hear any of these things or have your own I didn’t say? I know some of you do. I’ve talked to many moms who say the same things. And many of them are able-bodied!
You are Just the Mom Your Child Needs
God has entrusted you with your child. He loves your child even more than you do. God has lessons intended for your children that only you can teach them. When I feel like a burden, can also be used for growth in their lives. God could have chosen any mom for your children and He choose you. Remember that when your feelings don’t line up with the fact; God makes no mistakes.
Differences
My children are much more careful around people who are disabled. They are kinder and more aware of people and their differences around them. This not only includes physically disabled people but also the mentally disabled. People from all walks of life. People of different colors or the homeless or defenseless.
Kindness
While my children are not always kind, they do know how to be kind and do so frequently. They think of what will help me or someone else.
Helping
It’s not fun to have a Mom with a disability, but they help much more than most children do. I can’t sweep or vacuum, so that’s their chores. I have trouble getting all the laundry done since my chair won’t fit in the laundry room. They bring it to me and I fold it. And just think about going away! Loading and unloading my chair and being a companion so I can go out is definitely a biggie.
Modeling
While you are going through hard things, guess who’s watching closely? Your kids! They are watching to see how you handle whatever you are going through. My children have seen me through my struggles after my amputation surgery, and 2 subsequent ones for revisions. They see how you treat the people who help you; the nurses, doctors, physical therapists, even the orderlies or the person who brings you supper. How you act and treat people will be what they model. I always make sure to pray for a person God wants me to minister to while in the hospital.
Time Spent with Your Children
While spending your time with your children, your first thought may be of all the things you can’t do. But, it should be listing all the things you CAN do. We have a lot of one on one talks. Everyone loves at least some games. We watched movies, even when I was in the hospital. We walk and “roll.” They walk and I roll. Crafts, music, coloring, are just a few of the things I do with my children. What kinds of things do you like to do?
Faith
Do you praise God or curse him for what He’s done for you? I have a love/hate relationship with my wheelchair. I love that it gives me the freedom to go about places in my home or out but I really hate that I have to be in it. I look longingly ahead for when I will have a new body and can dance. Right now, I’d settle for being able to use my prosthetic. But how would your children describe your relationship with God? Do they know how much you love Him? Because of or in spite of your disability?
Grace
“the ability to live with uncertainty requires courage and the need to ask questions more than find answers.” Ester de Waal
Give yourself grace. God has abundant grace for you. . I’ll bet even your friends and family give you more grace than you do yourself. And give them grace too. Remember, it’s ok to not be okay when you are going through hard things. Just remember, your family is also going through hard things too. Give them space to question, time to think things through on their own, and after giving them the basics, depending on age, time to ask questions.
Don’t forget to give yourself time too. Even just to get through the day. I’m writing this to myself, also. I have to remind myself this weekly, daily, and, sometimes hourly.
What tips do you have to be a more confident mom with a disability?
“I hope this blog post will give you the information you need to make a decision about getting a spinal stimulator. I would like to share my experience with one.
“So, what is it?” “Why would someone want one?” “How does it work?” These are all questions that may be running through your head right now. Hopefully this blog post will answer some of those questions and help you decide if this is something for you or not.
What is a spinal stimulator and what does it do?
A spinal stimulator is a small, battery-powered device that can be used to treat back pain and other conditions of the spine. It works by sending out low frequency electrical impulses along specific pathways in your nervous system; this relieves pressure on nerve roots without stimulating them directly which lessens symptoms such as tingling or sharp pains associated with sciatica blocks because they’re not being overworked as much .
A spinal stimulator is surgically implanted in the lower back area near the spine where pain originates from. It sends electrical impulses to block pain signals from traveling up to the brain.
The benefits are seen within minutes after placement so it’s important for patients who have been unsuccessful conservatively through physical therapy methods before surgery may want an option besides just waiting around hoping things will get better
Why I got a spinal stimulator
After years of living with chronic pain and undergoing many surgeries, my pain management doctor talked to me about a spinal stimulator.
After my amputation, I had both chronic pain in my stump as well as horrible phantom pain. I had horrible pain in my foot and ankle that wasn’t even there anymore!
The spinal stimulator helped relieve my phantom pain and even some of the real pain in my stump. My life has improved since the operation and I feel like a new person most of the time.
My experience with my spine stimulator
I had a trial the month before my surgery and WOW, what a difference! Imedietly after surgery I felt instant relief. No more shooting pain in my non-existant ankle or foot. Way less pain in my stump. I have a small IPhone that I use to turn the electrical impulses up or down. That way even on days that would normmally be bad, I can still get relief.
Now, it doesn’t take away all the pain but it cut it by more than half. Also, it doesn’t cut pain in any other area than what it was hooked up to do. I’ve had my stimulator for 3 months now and it works wonders. Spinal stimulators can be life-changing for people living with chronic pain If you’re struggling with chronic pain, talk to your doctor about this treatment option
The implantation process
The implementation process of a spine stimulator is not an easy one.
The pain and discomfort that I experienced as I went through the trial and then the main surgery was very demanding, but it does allow me to live my life without as many limitations or worries about what may happen in the future.
The first surgery involved me being awake while the Doctor put in the wires and then he taped the battery pack to me. The second surgery the battery pack was installed under my skin. The Doctor made a pocket in the muscle and the battery pack was placed there. There was discomfort from the surgery at the insision site but not at my stump which was a huge relief.
Benefits of having a spinal stimulator
Advantages of having a spinal stimulator include: A safe and effective way to relieve pain!
Side effects of the surgery and device
Side effects of the spinal stimulator surgery and device are usually short-term. Of course, there’s no way for anyone to know whether they’re going experience any side effect or not until after surgery has occurred but if everything goes well then most patients should be able to resume their normal activities without too much difficulty within one week following surgery date.
Things to consider before getting a spinal stimulator implanted in your body
A spinal stimulator is a type of device that can be used to treat chronic pain. Before getting one implanted in your body, there are some important things you need consider like:
-How long will it take before I start feeling relief from my symptoms? (this depends on how severe they were)
What kind if risks come with this procedure and what do doctors say about them risk versus reward ratio wise?”
What’s more likely going happen even though we implant into us these little babies called Spinal Stimulators aim at helping alleviate our suffering by delivering electrical impulses deep within soft tissue near nerves ending up being quite an ambitious venture given all its complexities
Tips on using my new spinal stimulator
Using my new spinal stimulator is easy! Here are some tips to get you started. Best ways to use your new spinal stimulator.
Watch out for turning, bending, and stretching to much the first few weeks after surgery.
The following tips will help you get the most out of your device. Remember that it takes about two weeks for them all become comfortable and ready so don’t give up!
You can also do some gentle neck stretches before bedtime or whenever you need extra relief while using this machine: –
Keep your head raised higher than your back when seated at a desk. Sitting with feet flat on floor helps take pressure off lower spine so sit more comfortably without slouching;
Is a spinal stimulator for you?
I can’t believe how much relief a spinal stimulator has given me. It’s been about three months since the implantation of my neurostimulation device, and it is still changing my life for the better every day!
You may be wondering what this procedure entails or if you are eligible to get one yourself. If you live with chronic pain, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t explore all of your options before resorting to surgery.
If you need more information on whether this treatment could benefit you in any way, I’m happy to answer any questions that you have about getting a spinal stimulator.
My daughter had Covid and not one other person in our household got Covid. When we went in for testing, we were told to expect 50-75% of our household to get sick also. When the health department called to talk to her about tracking Covid, they were astonished that not one other person in our house was sick.
No One Did,
It was difficult, but here’s what we did.
Isolate
We isolated our daughter from everyone else. My other daughter slept in the living room. No one else was allowed to talk to her except on the phone. Daughter 1 kept opening the door and sticking her head out because she was lonely or bored.
Meals
We set a tray with her food outside her door and knocked. Kinda like when you knocked and ran outside someone’s house. She could text for drinks or snacks between times. Although she wasn’t that hungry. When she was done, she put her tray right outside the door. Hmmm, kinda like room service.
Sanitize
We sanitized the entire house after she had a positive test for Covid. We opened up windows and ran a diffuser with lemon oil. Then we deep cleaned the house. We also went through wipe sanitized the doorknobs, light switches, and remotes every day. We found a sanitizer that works for both phones and remotes that uses essential oils. I’m not sure how much it helps but my phone smells good. One good thing, I guess my spring cleaning is mostly done.
Bathroom
The only time our daughter came out was to use the bathroom. She came out with her container of sanitizer wipes and when she was done using the bathroom she wiped down everything she touched with the sanitizing wipes.
Food
I fed our daughter chicken soup, lots and lots of liquids. Ginger ale, tea, small amounts of coffee, lots of water, Make sure the food is soft and non-dairy to limit mucus and congestion. Chicken and beef broth are great choices, juices- not so much. They are too full of sugar and sugar depresses your immune system. Sugar-free popsicles are great, we buy the fruit ones.
PPE
Every time I did have to come face to face with my daughter, we both wore face masks. She wore a face mask to the bathroom too. When I or someone else took her tray from the door, we used glaves. We were extremely careful not to touch anything with our bare hands that she had touched. That also includes her laundry. We used gloves and washed her clothes in the sanitizer setting.
Give Them Things to Do
Our daughter got bored easily. And she’s an adult! When they feel ok, if they do, hopefully, they will want something to do. Coloring books, child or adult with markers or crayons are good. Look for books to interest, and of course; electronics. I usually kept a box of quiet things to do when my children were little for when they were sick.
Listen
I know even though we were only a door apart, my daughter felt really alone. We had some long phone conversations, as did friends and other relatives. And you still might have to use boundaries. Also, listen to how they talk. Are they raspy? How much do they cough? Is it increasing? Are they trying to catch their breath?
Take Request
Within reason. If it’s easy to get and could keep them busy, then it’s probably a good idea. Now, this does not apply to little children. You know the maturity level of your child. The same with over the counter medicines.
I certainly hope none of you have to experience Covid to yourself or your family. But if you do, I hope these tips help.
What tips do you have that’s worked for you and your family?
I’m writing to all of you moms with physical limits. Moms that never feel like they are doing enough. Moms that feel like a burden on their families. And Moms who feel like they can never catch up. This is for you. I teach Moms to thrive with their physical limitations. I’ve always written to moms, but now I’m writing specifically to you.
After the last year, my focus has changed. My limitations were not always seen, but I lived with them every day. Now, my physical limits are apparent for everyone to see. And resources are few, moms who understand and walk this path even less. So I hope to soon open a community just for moms like us.
Physical Limits
I have physical limits I deal with every day and I’m guessing you do too. Having had Charcot, an amputation, fibromyalgia, arthritis, chronic pain, and am currently in a wheelchair. I’ve had over 30 surgeries and 40 hospitalizations. Resilience and humility have been words I am well acquainted with. I’ve struggled where you have and learned many tips and tricks to make it easier to thrive as a wife, mom, and homemaker.
Resources to Help You
Learn how to set energy limits on your day. The best resource I’ve found is The Spoon Theory. But I will also teach you how to use the best time of day for you. For instance, I know I have to all my brain work in the morning. I have foggy thinking later in the day and I make more mistakes. I also have stories already regarding amputations,recovery,when you feel like a burden., living with chronic pain, and Charcot. What would you want to learn about?
Daily Helps
There are tools to use to help. I use and have a love/hate relationship with my wheelchair. I love it because I can get around, but I hate that I have to use it. Then I have an IWalk that I’m trying to learn to use. I’m getting a new socket on my prosthetic leg next week. You might use crutches, braces of some kind, or a walker. That’s great! It makes you more Independent. There are tools in the kitchen to help and I use my grabber every day.
Learn How To Live with Bad Days
Living life with physical limits brings new challenges and triumphs. Some days I feel so bad most of the day I spend in bed. And there are days I have more energy than others and can get a lot done. I have to rely on other people all the time right now. It’s a great way to learn humility, whether you want to or not. Smile. I keep a running to-do list of things I want to learn, books to read, and articles to write. It’s also a great day to cuddle and watch a movie.
Attitude is Everything
It’s all in your attitude. I hear people all the time ask me why I would go through so much. Even a daughter who walked away from God because she told me ” Mom, you have believed and served God and this is what he’s done to you. ” I have never asked God “Why?” I have asked them why not me? Why do people expect God to be a genie in a lamp granting wishes?
Now, I don’t enjoy being in pain all the time, being an amputee, having 2 house fires, and over 30+ surgeries. But I do know there’s a purpose for everything. I know God is still faithful. God is still good, even when I can’t see the purpose. And how I look at everything makes the difference. You can still bless others and enjoy life even with physical limitations. What would you like to learn about and how can I help?
First of all, I have to say I’m sorry for being absent this last year. I had a lot to deal with being a new amputee and having 2 extra surgeries besides. Since I’ve had so many questions about my amputation story, I’m here to tell you more about that.
My Amputation Story
Last January, I became an amputee. It happened after a long battle with Charcot. Charcot is a bone disease that basically crushes your bones. I had over a dozen surgeries with steel rods, plates, and many pins to hold my foot together enough to walk. I even had rubber bands between my tibia and fibula to hold those together since over half of my ankle bones had eroded. Eventually, there were not enough bones to attach anything else to and I had to have my left leg amputated mid-calf.
Hospitalizations and Surgery
I was in the hospital a week after my amputation surgery and then at a rehabilitation hospital for 2 weeks after that. The health care was wonderful and thankfully, before, Covid started here. I had a fall at the hospital so that is why I was sent to the rehab hospital. I learned so many things there I wouldn’t have known just going home. They taught me how to safely transfer chairs back and forth. Daily skills that used to come naturally like dressings, showering, and helping around the house. I had 3 hours a day of Physical and Occupational therapy. I also learned I had more limits. If I was too tired to shower safely, I used baby wipes and took one the next day. It was hard work but well worth it. I am actually stronger now in my upper body than I ever have been. And I am keeping on a great exercise schedule for the first time in my life. When you know your health really depends on it, you will find the time to do it.
My Prosthetic
Since I am a slow healer, it took until the end of May before I could wear a prosthetic. The feeling of freedom from just being able to walking, even holding onto bars, can’t be beaten. You start out just wearing it an hour or two a day and build up from there. BY August, I could wear it 6-8 hours a day. There were so many things I never thought about wearing one.
I thought I could just put my leg on and go about my day. Ha-ha. You have to check your skin for skin irritations and cuts a couple of times a day. The swelling goes up and down so you have to add or replace socks to get the proper thickness for your prosthetic that day. And you SWEAT!!! Gross! A LOT!. In the summer, you take off your leg and empty it out. Yuck! But I could go away by myself. I could walk around. I’m tall, 6’1”, and being in a wheelchair, I have the same field of vision as a very short person. It’s been a very different experience.
Tools to Make Life Easier
Doing household things I normally did that I know do a little differently. For instance, I have a grabber for picking things up. Actually, I have 2 gabbers. The second one had a little peg on the end for pulling up belt loops or other small items; You have to change a lot of ways of doing things. I barely wear button-up pants because I still can’t balance as long on one leg without holding on to something. So I choose quick items to dress in. It also has a magnet on the end for picking things up. I use a push me-pull me stick for pulling the oven racks. And I learned to only pick up things from the sides instead of leaning over after almost falling out of my chair. Now, I have a Bob Sweep for vacuuming now since I can’t do that anymore. I do know some wheelchair users use a stick vacuum, the cord is a no-no.
Infection, Hospitalizations, and more Surgeries
In August, I was found to have an infection in my stump. While it was hard knowing I had the infection, the really hard part was being back in a wheelchair full-time again. Knowing that I couldn’t wear my prosthetic was a major blow. I had 2 other surgeries on my stump, one in October and another in November. I had encapsulated infections, which is just infection basically enclosed in like a balloon, Both times they had to go in and scrape out the infection and scrape the bone. The second time, I had a PIC line put in for 6 weeks to combat the infection.
The hospital stays were really different too. No visitors. This was really hard on my children. When I was at the hospital and rehab they came and visited and even ate meals. This time was only phone calls. The hospital was so much quieter than normal. I spent 5 days the first time and 8 the second. About 5 weeks total this year in the hospital. Right now I am infection free although I still haven’t been able to wear my prosthetic yet because of pain. Hopefully soon.
Moving Challenges
In January our family moved from an upstairs apartment to a downstairs apartment. Just in time, one week before my amputation. In September we moved, again. We looked for 2 months before we found a rental house that was wheelchair accessible. Most homes had smaller bedroom and bathroom doors so a wheelchair wouldn’t fit in the doors. We looked at house after house before we finally found one and we live in a large city. It’s also way harder to pack and unpack from a wheelchair. But our home is mostly done, despite 2 surgeries and hospital stays and Christmas and a PIC line and Covid.
The day after moving, my son and I were unpacking, everyone else was cleaning the old apartment. We went to the store and I had a major fall. The sidewalk sloped and I flew off my scooter and into the street. Several kind people stopped and helped me up. I will say most people are very kind. I ended up battered and bruised, no broken bones but I had a concussion. So now, I have had to watch much more carefully how I go and learn to pay closer attention to my surroundings.
Waiting to Wear my Prostesis
Right now, I was waiting as patiently as I can to wear my prosthetic again. I was only able to wear it for 3 months last year. I am having pain for no reason they can find as well as phantom pain. That is a pain in which I can feel say my ankle hurts or the top of my foot. Both of which are no longer there. So I have to have no pain for a week before I can try it on again and see how I do. I also have to see my prosthetist and get it refitted. After 2 surgeries and the doctor cutting out a lot of scar tissue off my stump and it is a lot smaller than it was. I am having a new socket built. This is where I am now with my amputation story, if you have questions, feel free to ask.
Coming Up
I’m looking ahead to where I want my blog to go. I still want to help Moms. I also want to do more food prep, freezer meals, and cooking if you are interested in it. What can I help you with? How can I serve you?
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